You are not a troublemaker. You are a truth teller. “As if the abuse wasn’t bad enough.” - A Survivor The truth hurts. But it helps so much more. Who’s to say what survivors need and deserve? Survivors, that’s who. The truth is more powerful than any argument against it.

My Statement Regarding Child Victims Act Lawsuit Against Adam Savage

My name is Miranda Savage Pacchiana and I am a survivor of child sexual abuse. My older brother, Adam Savage sexually assaulted me repeatedly over the course of several years, starting when I was seven years old.

As a child, this experience shook my sense of safety and crushed my self-confidence. For decades afterward, I dealt with periods of depression and near-constant anxiety. These symptoms interfered with all aspects of my life, stunting my career aspirations, and robbing me of countless simple pleasures. In my mid-twenties, I sought treatment for the abuse and so began a long, arduous process of working to address the emotional impact of my trauma.

I last made contact with my brother, Adam Savage, over two decades ago. At the time, I called him out for his callous attitude about the abuse and his apparent disregard for the damage he had caused, but he chose not to acknowledge or show any compassion for my pain. Not once in the ensuing years have I seen evidence that my brother cares to truly understand what he did to me. He gives me no reason to believe that he has meaningfully examined whatever compelled him to commit sexual crimes as a minor.

But now, because of the NY Child Victims Act, I finally have the opportunity to pursue justice for the crimes my brother committed against me. While nothing can give back what Adam Savage took from me,  I hope this lawsuit will also demonstrate to my fellow survivors that we do not deserve to carry the shame of sexual abuse and assault.

I will never wake up one morning and stop being a survivor of child rape. I will always feel the impact of my brother’s abuse, including trust issues and nightmares that I live with to this day. What I hope to change, standing alongside so many other brave survivors, is to initiate an honest look at the epidemic of sexual abuse.

At least one in 6 boys and one in 4 girls will be sexually abused before age 18. We must do a better job of protecting children, starting by holding more abusers accountable. This happened to me. Statistically, it happened to someone you know. Maybe even someone in your family.  It’s time to tell.

That is why I’m here today. The public needs to know that Adam Savage sexually abused me when I was a child, as set forth in the lawsuit that I have finally been able to bring after all of these years. As a survivor and advocate for victims, I am determined to shine a light on the truth. Thank you.

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Fear, Loss, & the Grocery Store

The following is adapted from a bonus Truth & Consequences podcast episode recorded during the Covid-19 quarantine. I post it here because it addresses retraumatization and the resurfacing of past trauma and loss.  

If you have a few extra minutes this week, I’d like to share a story and some thoughts with you in the hopes that you’ll find it useful. It’s a story about going to the grocery store. Something that used to be an annoyingly frequent chore, at least to me, but has now become a whole different experience for a lot of us…of course, that’s IF you’re actually still venturing out to buy food in person.

Because our world has changed.

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Sexual Violence Is Only the ‘First Wound’

View the original post on The Mighty.

You might think, being a victim of sexual abuse or assault, it is the experience that affects survivors the most, causes the most damage in our lives and has the most lasting, destructive effects.

You might be wrong.

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